HOMOPHONIC 🌺 SHU LYN O'KEEFE

[piteous]

mEmses LAyter

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[piteous]

[ Anyway, predictably, after some clowning, Vash goes incredibly quiet. He's... Obviously grieving, despite how these are memories.

They're still lives lost and he wishes it didn't need to be the case. ]

[roseoftexas]

...

[ after a moment, shu pulls out a cigarette. ]

He had a cheque waiting to be cashed that would've only gone through after he murdered a teenaged boy. What would you have done differently?

[piteous]

... I wish there was another way.

[ He says, simply, which may be different from the response he gave Wolfwood in his own memory. It isn't as naive, not as optimistic, but it longs for something better and brighter than reality.

That doesn't answer Shu's question, in the end. ]

[roseoftexas]

Easier to wipe out stuff like this, the stuff that exists out of cold hard greed, compared to the acts of love and hate and everything inbetween.

Maybe there's another way for the first lot, but the latter is... [ well. impossible. ]

[piteous]

[ He's just quiet about that, not arguing. His question next has no preface, doesn't seem to be specifically about their memories, and yet it's related all the same. ]

You don't think people can change, Shu? [ It seems simple, easy, but. ] Are some people beyond saving...? Are some just lost forever?

[roseoftexas]

No, I think people can change.

But in the same way you try not to generalise - “not everyone’s bad, not everyone’s like that”, don’t you think it goes the other way too? Not everyone is irredeemable, but do you risk multiple lives giving them the chance to prove you wrong?

What if they never do?

[piteous]

... That's something we don't know. Opportunity disappears when they die.

I believe everyone's ticket is blank.

[roseoftexas]

You want to take responsibility for every life lost if you're wrong?

[piteous]

I'd rather prevent any loss and save each person I can.

[ Which is worse responsibility. Sometimes you're surrounded by the same type of people, Shu. ]

[roseoftexas]

That's not always possible. You've gotta know that.

[piteous]

... I do.

[ Said with a morose smile, grateful yet listless. ]

Because of people like you, I could keep my ideals and live the way I did.

[ Vash is very aware that he can go on to not kill, he can protect with pacifism, only because of others who can pull the trigger and protect by the proper ways of the gun. People who spill blood allow him to not spill any himself... It pains him. It wraps him up in threads and threads of guilt because he knows so well that it's selfish hang onto compassion and the love for his fellow man, even if they very much do not love him back. It's quiet wish that this wasn't the reality.

Lowering his head some, smile still plastered on his face, he closes his eyes. ]

Thank you.

[ Genuinely, full of remorseful gratitude. ]

[roseoftexas]

[ this is a very sweet and sincere bracket text and thread, but shu is also filled with an understanding of why wolfwood fights vash behind the UG costco so damn much. ]

...

I'm not mad you've been able to live like that, but-- [ hm. ]

Is it just the idea of you personally killing people you're so against? Because you can't live like that without someone pulling the trigger on your behalf.

[piteous]

[ stop their divorce ]

It's a promise I made to someone, kind of a lifestyle I picked up in their memory, but honestly I'm against killing in general... It took me a while to accept other ways of living and surviving.

I still would rather it be me who faces the barrel of a gun. If I had the choice, I'd always make it be me.

[ Because as the memory shows, Vash thinks he can dodge as many bullets as he needs to. If all of the bullets go to him, it's easier. Better. ]

[roseoftexas]

[ listen if i'm not getting kisses you'd better be i point my gun at you and lowe. ]

...

[ if this was emotion week, he'd feel exhausted. ]

That sounds pretty self-sacrificial.

[piteous]

Bullets wouldn't kill me—at least at home.

[ They would definitely kill him here. ]